We are back from our 7 month Mission Trip. We left pretty much everything to go seek God in a different context, in a different culture, to find more of His heart. Being back people have asked, “How was it? Good?” or they would make a comment, “Glad your back.” Some have asked, “What is it like being back?”
These are meaningful questions, made in somewhat sincerity, but things are not that simple as to respond with one or two words. There is not a simple answer nor response for even the comment, “Glad you’re back.” Our hearts swell with experiences, and thoughts that swim inside us. How can we let them out? Share them? Who really wants to listen and not to be just polite?
What was it like for Jesus to go back home? Ever thought about it? He was constantly traveling around the country speaking, teaching, healing, and on occasion would come to his home town.. Was He excited to see those He knew and grew up with? Did He have friends He would see? School Buddies? What about His own family..? Here is what we ready about His own family.
When His family heard this, they set out to restrain Him, because they said, “He’s out of His mind.” Mark 3:2
Then Jesus told them, “A prophet is honored everywhere except in his own hometown and among his relatives and his own family.” Mark 6:4
Not the welcome you would expect.. Not the welcome we would expect from those closest. Isn’t it so true though?? Those closest to us are often the ones that misunderstand us the most.. Those who should hold our hearts the softest, feeding our spirits the most, providing that place of safety are often the ones to be the quickest to judge, condemn, cast the first stone, and be the most critical.
“He went away from there and came to his hometown, and his disciples followed him. 2 And on the Sabbath he began to teach in the synagogue, and many who heard him were astonished, saying, “Where did this man get these things? What is the wisdom given to him? How are such mighty works done by his hands? 3 Is not this the carpenter, the son of Mary and brother of James and Joses and Judas and Simon? And are not his sisters here with us?” And they took offense at him. “
Jesus knew this.. He understood it. But I am sure the pain is still there. For He was “Tempted in all parts as we.” Clothing himself in humanity he felt the pangs of betrayal, forsakenness, and loneliness.. And maybe, just maybe he walked these road willingly knowing that our hearts are fickle. Our passions are fleeting..
My heart is fickle.. My passion is fleeting.. I keep hearing this song, “If I give it all to You will You make it all New? And If I open up my hands will You fill them again??” I am asking. Wondering, Searching.. I am holding out my empty hands, hoping they will be filled again. I am giving my heart away, hoping it will be made new. My passion is fleeting, and I look once again to the scriptures to make sense of my life, seeing that even now, I am understood. I have one who was tempted in every way.
I will rest.. Not in the comfort of others, for they like me, are fleeting. Not in the joy of sharing my heart, for few who want to hear it.. But I will rest that somehow this will all make sense and the Author has not finished writing out my story/